.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Randomize
