im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
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I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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