Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
