take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I woke up under a house in Key West
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