the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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