its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
