WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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