it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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