You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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