"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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