did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
