Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
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