Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
