just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
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