i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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