Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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