i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I looked at my own cervix.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
