pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
