remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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