i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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