y did u give ur computer a hand job?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
Randomize