I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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