It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.