I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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