I want to make a zoo with you.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize