420 ftw
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
