is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
