need another drink. this is the easiest way
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
come find me please
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going