Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(+66): View more from Thailand

She said her name was "party"

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(+66): She said her name was "party" http://tfl.nu/08y0

Replies (3) Good night (2362) Bad night (602)
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(443): View more from Maryland

I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart

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(443): I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart http://tfl.nu/al7w

Replies (182) Good night (52616) Bad night (2244)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.

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(732): some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america. http://tfl.nu/u0og

Replies (33) Good night (785) Bad night (4990)
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(586): View more from Michigan

Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app

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(586): Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app http://tfl.nu/uu0s

Replies (78) Good night (6129) Bad night (2292)
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(253): View more from Washington

Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....

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(253): Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined..... http://tfl.nu/yuuz

Replies (13) Good night (927) Bad night (4528)
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(310): View more from California

My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.

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(310): My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute. http://tfl.nu/0bii

Replies (6) Good night (2861) Bad night (1080)
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(631): View more from New York

Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.

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(631): Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you. http://tfl.nu/saac

Replies (6) Good night (3722) Bad night (856)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.

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(202): Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out. http://tfl.nu/88jd

Replies (10) Good night (1993) Bad night (570)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over

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(908): You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over http://tfl.nu/or3u

Replies (2) Good night (2379) Bad night (629)
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(541): View more from Oregon

So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."

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(541): So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here." http://tfl.nu/zbul

Replies (5) Good night (1919) Bad night (463)
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(517): View more from Michigan

Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.

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(517): Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night. http://tfl.nu/6sjb

Replies (4) Good night (629) Bad night (1015)
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(518): View more from New York

Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future

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(518): Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future http://tfl.nu/c1z9

Replies (1) Good night (1087) Bad night (856)
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(630): View more from Illinois

I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.

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(630): I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track. http://tfl.nu/9q0f

Replies (1) Good night (451) Bad night (552)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.

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(570): 2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card. http://tfl.nu/36zr

Replies (8) Good night (488) Bad night (1265)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language

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(508): Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language http://tfl.nu/6y9g

Replies (5) Good night (752) Bad night (341)

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