So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
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