is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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