Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Still dying that you shit outside
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize