The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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