Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
