OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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