at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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