walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
My move is emasculating men with my superior intellect and it's not as charming when they can't see my huge rack.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
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