North Korea, Best Korea!
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
