So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
