On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
it's like iHOP with fire
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
