roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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