Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize
