You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
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i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
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