you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
