Sober January is a disaster.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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