i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
