Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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