i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
