I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
