The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
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He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
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What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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