wat bout pragnant strippers??
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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