I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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