ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
